Papers, Random, Uncategorized

I Have Fallen Into Love

True inspiration begets creation so below is a portion of a letter that I was inspired to write. This is the product of literature class, reading The Shadow of the Wind, receiving some lovely second hand books and a hearing of, then reading of Norah Pollard. I wish to express much gratitude to all of the above but mostly to Jimmy and the Moon Girl…

Fallen Into Love

It is true. I have fallen in love. I am no longer moving toward but authentically standing in the state of being, giving and receiving love.  Maybe you would see things as I see them if you knew her a little better so I will try to describe with words what God has so beautifully created and gifted me with.

She is light, really truly light. She carries herself with grace throughout every situation. She also contains a fire that only a woman of Latin decent could happen to muster; a firecracker with the childlike powder of wonder and passion to fuel her.  Her sense of humor astounds and she has a smile that makes the sun look dull. She is a dreamer who still believes that anything and everything is possible and changes the way that I see the world every single day. She inspires me to be better in every way. To care for the world but still be true to who you are. She is one of the smartest people I know. From theology to cake baking, she knows so much about so many things and wants to learn something new every day. She inspires me to do the same. She is in love with art, music, literature, theater, and just recently discovered a great love for poetry. She has a voice that never ceases to amaze. She sings. I mean really sings. She opens herself up in front of people for fun. She tells them her story with a song and leaves parts of herself on stage simply for the feeling of being understood even if it is only for three and a half minutes. This tells me that she is in it for the experience, for nothing else but to feel. She is in it for the sensual. I have never met anyone in the world like her and I know without a doubt I will never meet another soul with the same heat ever again. She has sparked something within me that is ceasing to dissipate and I have devoted my entire being into figuring out who and what she is, loves, craves and desires. I will devote my everything to her from here on. I wish that you could know what this feels like. I wish that for a moment you could begin to witness what I have been so privileged to know and see. To sound as cliché as humanly possible, this is no ordinary love. I have promised myself to tell her every day that she is the most beautiful creature created and every moment that we spend together is an adventure of epic proportions. We are learning and loving everything about each other from the depths within to the coverings we bare, and hers is as gloriously unique as the complexities that form her aura. She is soft and supple and lovely in her movements; it is ethereal.

So yes, I am falling in love. And yes, it is intense. But I will take it as far and as long as my life lets me because we are soul mates and are destined to be together for the remainder of my life… I will drown in this experience if I so choose because the person I am falling in love with is the one and only one for me. She was meant to be my soul mate forever and she will never leave me. Ever. She may hurt me, she may break me and her promises to me, but we are going to be with each other until our last breathes. We do not have a choice in the matter. This is what God has ordained. For this amazing wonderful beautiful soul filled created creature is now and forever will be me. I am the one that I am falling in love with. I am indulging my every whim. I am taking my time in every moment. I am savoring each bite, sip, sight, sound, color, spider fingered touch, shower, book and a cup of tea, stretch, bend, bow, handshake, sentence written,¬† sentence read, class, test, lesson, wrinkle, orgasm, bus ride, bill due and bill paid because they are my moments that will never again occur anywhere else in this universe. My rarity is now just coming into my perspective and rather than push it away, I am choosing to do the exact opposite of what I have been telling myself to do for the entirety of my existence. Instead of pushing against it, denying myself for fear of pride, I am letting it carry me into every movement and every moment. It is the most amazing high I have ever known. I have no idea how I got so lucky. Something clicked. I get it now. I hope you do too.

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Random, Uncategorized

The Shadow of the Wind

I began this book 2 days ago on a whim (to join a discussion group at school) and I have not been able to put it down. Beyond that, it has led me on quite a journey. Literally, in the sense that the book is exquisitely written, but figuratively in the fact that I feel like I am part of the story as it unfolds. From the beginning, I was in love. It reminds me of how much I truly love books and the soul that each and every one contains. Books have always been my obsession and I have decided to give in.  Zafon does a terrific job in reminding the reader how each book that has ever been and will ever be written contains the soul of not only the author, but every person who has read it, breathed it or lived it. As I read that, I realized that this book has now become part of my soul as well. As I let that realization wash over me, the most amazing thing began to occur. I was filled with an incomparable  joy. This joy began to spill over into every area that I was currently living and was followed by an amazing conversation with a gentleman on the bus and a poetry reading from Nora Pollard that left me in awe. This  book has been the best thing that has ever happened to me simply because it caused me to wake up to the love I have neglected for quite some time. I thank Carlos Ruiz Zafron from the bottom of my little heart for because of his genius, I will never be the same.

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